Mum for some weird reason doesn't believe in self-service. We got back from our walk and we always get a chewy when we have leads off. Well I'm sure the grouchy one gets a bigger one than me as hers lasts ages. So after politely asking if I could share and the grouchy one telling me to bog off (I thought ladies were meant to be sweet and demure) I then thought mum must have been mistaken only giving me half so I climbed the sofa and carefully leant on the top of my cage and would you believe I got yelled at! There is no justice in this world I tell you. Well I'm off to see if the grouchy one has left any crumbs.

Hi

Not blogged for a little while but I've a busy social life doncha know. Well it's the cold time of year when the world goes all funny and white. I love it plus it's when I can show the humans that I oughta be worshipped as I can walk on water! TV's been a bit naff but I keep taking the best seat in Grandpawrents house to watch it though. What do you think comfy or what?

Why am I blamed for everything?

Is it just me or do the humans blame others for everything too. Somebody farted in the car- it must be Kieko. He's carrying a sock around- Kieko must have stolen it. There are muddy pawprints up the door- it must be Kieko.
The latest thing is that the grounchy one's collar managed to "fall" off when we were outside in the Grandpawrents garden and as it is dark and mum being an idiot without a torch bought a black collar it meant the grouchy one had to wear a harness home. So she is now the really peeved off one and once again I'm told it's all  MY fault. I fail to see where my actions came into all this.

The peeved one in all her glory.

The world keeps exploding!

The world has finally gone as mad as my mum. Everything keeps whistling and banging. I'm having to stick close to mum to protect her (it's not that I'm scared) and she keeps muttering about personal space huh I'd like to see how much shes wants space when the monsters attack when I'm away from her. I even had to stay with the grouchy one last night as she kept saying she didn't want to sleep alone.

*Is in hiding*

A word to the wise when mum starts questioning your parentage (even though the daft bint has it written on paper along with the really long embarassing name) it is best to clear the area as it means she is not best pleased.
I mean so what I was a tiny bit muddy when she came home I only covered a third of the floor and a bit of the wall AND I didn't do my usual trick of jumping on the sofa but am I rewarded Oh No it was the towel and she had the audacity to dry my feet. Huh. The grouchy one suck up she is was only wet and asked to be towelled dry (I worry about her sometimes).

I was so right!

All along I've tried to protect everyone from the minature humans as I'm sure they are Orcs or at least Trolls and tonight I was proved right they showed their true face and mum had to bribe them away with the "not-for-puppies" food. She was being silly as I'd have just howled at them until they went but she had the nerve not to let me answer MY door. Huh I best go keep a watch out incase more monsters escape from their rolling prisons a dogs work is never done.

The humans are still being mean!

What is a dog to do. This morning mum went to work so the grouchy one and I went out to play in our outside house and garden. It hadn't been too long when my keen senses detected someone in the house (ok maybe Kali was already whinging) After a valiant attempt at bulldozing the door which didn't work we were left outside! Mum told me later it had been Grandpaw and Grandma who had come in to let the GasMan in. First of all a stranger was allowed in MY house without being personally lick checked by me and then I pride myself on being a green dog and trying to get the car to move by my gas emissions if mum wanted the house doing aswell she could have asked instead of getting some GasMan in. Huh I'll never understand the two-leggers.

I am NOT a girl!

Why is it that admirers constantly call me cute and pretty and worst still refer to me as a girl! I am a butch manly dog and try to prove this to mum by coming into the house covered in as much dirt as I can but the ultimate insult came this morning.
SHE GAVE ME A PEDICURE! (granted that nail was a bit long and starting to dig in) It's the principal of the matter males do not have pedicures and to add insult to injury the grouchy one the only bitch among us didn't have to have one as she chews her nails (plus I don't think mum wanted to lose a finger as the grouchy one is in a mega bad mood this morning.)
Well see if I talk to mum again I may have to phone the RSPCA on her I'm sure they'd agree that you don't give manly dogs pedicures.

Mum just doesn't understand!

Well yesterday was a busy day. First I had to look after the grouchy one all day while mum was out doing the horses. Kali said she felt cold so I managed to get the door open and let her into the house (which was quite an achievement if you ask me) but mum didn't seem pleased when she got home. Then we left the grouchy one with the grandparent while I went to skool. Mum made me wear the grabby thing in the car doesn't she know I need to be free to tell them which direction to go?
Then we got to skool and a load of dogs where misbehaving and jumping about I tried to tell them to behave but again I got told off. Mum is so weird. I did skool and was brilliant then we had to go home after picking up the grouchy one. It was a long day and I'm so underapprechiated.

Meet me!

Well seems as mum is convinced that people do exist that don't know who I am (I really don't believe this) I'd better introduce myself.
I'm Kieko a red male Japanese Shiba Inu. I'm a year old and very handsome if I do say so myself. I live with mum and the grouchy one (also know as Kali who is also a Shiba but not important honest). It's a hard life being the male of house and trying to keep everyone in line so I thought I'd share what I have to put up with.